It’s true, we ALL suffer from feeling like there’s something missing, or we aren’t good enough, or that we’re lacking in some way…
Certainly, the human part of us can fall into this kind of thinking. Especially when we feel anxious or fearful.
I think it’s helpful to recognize that we encounter feelings of lack or not enough-ness when we either feel separate from the one-ness and disconnected from the universe, OR we identify and believe we are our self image / personality which comes with, according to Robert Holden’s new book on the Enneagram, a core sense of deficiency.
Having fun connecting with the Divine Feminine? Doesn’t it feel amazing?
Here’s another way to connect to that essence.
It’s our last mothering tool.
Can you guess what it is?
Yes, it’s connecting to the great goddess on which we live and get ALL of our physical sustenance and nourishment, Mother Earth.
During the Covid lockdown, I did a wonderful initiation into seeing the earth as Tara- Tara Gaia. And yet, there are countless first nations who have and continue to honor the earth as our sacred mother.
How has your journey of re-parenting been going?
Have you been able to heal some of that woundedness?
Did you get a glimpse or feel into the excitement of your inner magic?!?
If you’re ready for an even deeper step, this is just for you.
Today we’re exploring how to work with the Divine Mother and bringing that woundedness to the Mother of all mothers, to the essence of the Goddess that dwells within.
I thought for the the next sequence of blogs, we’d explore this idea of mothering, being mothered, and re-parenting ourselves. It feels timely and necessary. Maybe it’s because I also work as a psychotherapist that this topic is much on my mind…
So today we’ll explore the idea of re-parenting our wounded inner child.
Are you familiar with that expression? The wounded child?
From Caroline Myss’ work, we know that we all have a child archetype in our constellation. In part, because each of us experienced a childhood. And, at some point, (unfortunately) we got a negative message(s) about ourselves.
I bet you can see, even touch, a floor right now and perhaps a ceiling overhead- wherever you’re reading these words, yes?
Most structures have both , but did you know that this (floors & ceilings) is also an idea stock traders talk about?
It’s part of a metrics they use to evaluate where a stock may move. As a company’s stock drops in price, it can “hit a floor.” This might indicate a time to buy. Stocks can also “hit ceilings” which could indicate a time to sell. Obviously, this is a basic definition, but recently I took this way of thinking about floors and ceilings and applied it to the process of our inner work.
What do I mean?
Have you ever thought about the difference between perception and vision?
According to A Course in Miracles, perception is defined as what we see with our senses, and how we view the world from the ego perspective. While vision is what we see with God/love/spirit.
The invitation for this January (as in right NOW) is to envision your year. One way I like to think about this, is to dream into the future and imagine how you want it to be.
To support you in this inquiry, I have a few tools.
Recently I read an article about a Bennington College professor, Claude Fredericks, who daily journaled. His diary is considered the longest ever at approximately 75,000 pages! He began when he was 8 and continued until his death at 89.
Fredericks wasn’t alone (although likely the most prolific.) People write all kinds of things for all sorts of reasons. Think little poems, observations, musings, even funny quips they’ve heard. Sound intriguing?
As the days get darker and the weather cooler, why not curl up with a cup of tea and a blank notebook?
Have you ever thought about patience as a super power?
It sounds kind of weird, I know, but I’ve been thinking about patience a lot lately.
Maybe it’s because I tore a tendon in my ankle and everything takes so much longer…although admittedly, I’ve never felt particularly patient.
What I've come to see recently, though, is that patience is a quality we have to hone.
The most obvious way we do that is with our willingness to wait, to forego immediate gratification.
We exhibit patience when we actively go against the desire to have/achieve/do something right away.
A few weeks ago I really messed up!
I promised my neighbor I’d pick up her mail while she was out of town but then completely forgot!
When she came back, she popped over to get it and that’s when I remembered!
Ugh.
I was SO embarrassed. I couldn’t believe that it had totally slipped my mind.
Rather than giving her an excuse, that we had house guests, I was exercising when she asked and not near my calendar, she didn’t remind me… I simply apologized.
Have you been using your God Box lately?
No? Are you not even sure what I'm talking about?
No problem!
A God Box is essentially a container of some sort. It can be made from anything already have such as a mason jar, basket or even a cardboard box.
Mine is a little wooden bowl with a lid that I received as a gift.
Take a minute to scrounge around. I'm sure you have an unused container lying about. If not, save the next cardboard box you get. You can even decorate it if you want!
I went to the movie theater for the first time since 2019 and saw Roadrunner, the documentary about Anthony Bourdain!
It wasn’t a thriller. We all know how it ended. 😭😭😭
Honestly, the movie made me sad all over again. Anthony Bourdain was such a radiant light in our world.
(Quick PSA -If you are feeling suicidal – please contact the suicide prevention lifeline at 1-800-273-8255)
After seeing the film, I found myself really trying to understand Bourdain’s thinking. I kept returning to a line one of his friend's said to describe him, “Tony was a searcher.”
Not sure what the weather’s been like where you live, but in my neck of the woods, it has been scarily HOT!
When I experience these clear signs from the earth that things are not right, it can throw me into a panic. You too?
So how do we manage that?
A tool I come back to again and again is a breath that I was taught by my guru twenty years ago. It’s called the Chidakash, the heart space over the head.
I used to fight all the time.
Not physical altercations. Mine was more internal.
I fought against the injustices of the world, the ways that institutions and people were hurting others…
I was one of those kids who would say, “it’s not fair!”
At some point, I stopped fighting. It was SO tiring!
What I began to do instead, was accept.
Accept myself.
Accept others.
Accept the world. (Ugh, I know that sounds hard, bear with me.)
